Question of the Day: Day 46
Why do you think that some people have trouble liking themselves?
posted by Michelle at 9:01 AM
We are looking for answers to some hard questions as we dig deep inside and explore our own core values and how that guides not just our own lives but the very world that we live in. These questions will be asked to a group of high school students but we would also like to hear from the world at large. While we hope to keep this forum wide open we do reserve the right to delete responses that we find to be offensive or combative in nature. Thank you for participating with us.
posted by Michelle at 9:01 AM
13 Comments:
One Word: Ideals. Society's ideals are impossible: the way you look, the way you dress, the way you act. It is all an act and sometimes prevents you from being true to yourself.
Liking yourself does not start from outside the person but from inside. Only you can make yourself happy. Unfortunately not everyone realizes this. And so people search for someone or something to make them happy. At best this leads to a temporary satisfaction. At worst this becomes addiction. The The, popular in the early 90s, has a great song called "True Happiness This Way Lies." I think it hits the mark.
I believe some people have trouble liking themselves because of what society tells them they who they should be and how they should act.I think though that everyone is beautiful and sexy in their own way.
I think that people fell bad about them seif beause other people around them say rude things to them. And they also make fun of them so they start to think that it is true. Also because people watch a lot of BET or MTV they wan't to look like thoose people.
because they dont have self confidence and dont know there chances.
We certainly live in a culture that emphasizes shallow or surface qualities(looks, wealth, athletic prowess) as our major source of self-worth. We can tell ourselves it isn't true, but it is very hard to overcome the images we are faced with hundreds of times a day. I think that the awareness and strength to rise above these shallow values and the ability to perceive our true self worth starts at home when we are very young. Parents have tremendous power in shaping their childrens' self image. Kids who grow up without loving support, praise and discipline will have trouble liking themselves. Sadly I think this snowballs when they act out in later years and are then continuously told they are no good by the authority figures in their lives.
The real truth is that we are all dealt different cards at birth, we walk different paths and face different circumstances, but nobody on earth can claim to be worth more than any other person. In God's eyes each person is exactly equal. It helps to dwell on that thought a little bit every day.
I think that people have a hard time liking themselves for numerous reasons. One of the more prominant reasons being lack of rienforcement of positive behaviors by someone that they respect then constantly getting down on them about everything else.
I also feel that our society in general has painted this picture of the perfect person and people try to compare themselves to that person instead of just wanting to be themselves. That constant battle always leaves them feeling defeated and unlikable.
People probably don't like themselfs because they are around people who bring them down. Also because there are alot of people with a low self-esteam level.
I beleave that you have to be able to like yourself before you can like anyone around you. I love myself and I am always trying to bring people up about themselfs. I think that it is very theriputic and it developes alot of spiritual growth.
I think that the reason is, that there that inscure or that they have been put down a lot.
I agree with a lot of what has already been said.
When our inner voice tells us negative things about ourselves then it is hard to feel good about who we are.
Whether these things are what we heard as a child or come from other sources it is important to turn them OFF. We can record new inner tapes by taking the time to focus on our strengths and recognize our own accomplishments in life.
It is also really important to NOT contribute to other people's negative self-talk by being mean, disrespectful, or in any way make them feel bad about who they are.
BE NICE TO YOURSELF AND TO OTHERS - ALWAYS.
R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Whether it be from one's self or from peer groups or from the media, whatever. Not likeing one's self is tied in some way to a lack of self-respect.
Sometimes, it is not justified. Like trying to live up to society's frequently rediculous ideals, like appearances. Sometimes, people don't like themselves due to their own actions which they know are inappropriate. We know it is wrong to lie, cheat, and steal, so if we do those things, we lack self-respect and we know it. That is a justified reason for not liking yourself. Fortunately, that stems from actions you can change. The crap coming from society you cannot change, but you CAN choose to deem it trivial.
Periodically, I have not liked myself. Sometimes from society's views, sometimes from the things I did which made me lose respect for myself. It probably happens to everyone. The trick is to do the right things or put the trivial things into proper perspective and move on. That will give you good self-esteem and give you an emotionally healthier view of your self.
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