We are looking for answers to some hard questions as we dig deep inside and explore our own core values and how that guides not just our own lives but the very world that we live in. These questions will be asked to a group of high school students but we would also like to hear from the world at large. While we hope to keep this forum wide open we do reserve the right to delete responses that we find to be offensive or combative in nature. Thank you for participating with us.
posted by Michelle at 7:39 AM
4 Comments:
Yes, I have seen others' alcoholism /drug abuse cost them their relationships & lives.
My father was an amazing human~being with a drinking problem. He was a functional alcoholic; worked two - sometimes three (ironic, part-time bar tender) jobs & I don't recall him ever missing a day of work due to drinking. But he surely did drink... (sometimes, he was a blast... loved to dance & have a good time- but other times, he was a wreck). He was a diabetic... he didn't take the disease seriously. By age 54, he had complete kidney failure & was going blind, ... ... he died at age 59. I've no doubt that he would have lived longer if he'd not spent the years during his 20's & 30's drinking heavily.
I also have an uncle who's liver is in dire condition- he is 48 years old and has been sober for 4 years... better late than never? I can not say that I truly understand addiction, but I've witnessed a lot of it & the trail of damage it leaves behind.
I see people tortured by the poor decisions they have made when drunk or high, by the unconscionable ways they treated their families/friends, the physical or psychological damage inflicted upon others and, for some, the complete compromise of character they allowed to happen - all for a score. I find that the first step is to to understand the control the drug has had on them, come to terms with these things personally, to make a commitment to take that control back when they are ready, to make amends where possible and then learn to forgive themselves and make a different life - one of which they can be proud. This healing rarely happens alone - therapy, 12-step support or the help of some other caring and involved individuals is crucial to such recovery. It can be done.
For those I know tormented as children by alcoholic or mentally ill parents, it takes tremendous work, encouragement, patience and strength to realize that none of their treatment was their fault and to begin to see themselves as courageous survivors. A talented and engaged therapist and the Anonymous groups can make a big difference as can regular doses of unconditional love, positive affirmations (learning to say them to oneself and beginning to believe them) and a caring support group.
Good thoughts to all those struggling with alcohol or drug addictions, the effects such addictions have had on them and others and those mistreated by someone who was more concerned with the drug than with treating them right. You deserve better.
I have only seen a little of this. A fairly close friend - someone that I would have liked to get closer to - was known as 'the dopehead' in our year. And, he was using a lot of weed. Nothing harder, everyone thinks that ones fine. But he was having huge mood swings - one moment he would be chilled out, the next he would be depressed and start taking it out on the people around him. He couldn't remember anything he had done in school if he had a joint that evening. Eventually his gf threatened to dump him and he stopped using for a while. Now his usage has grown again...but I dont see so much of him anymore and its hard to get to him. He could have had his pick of unis...now he is running around searching for anyone that will let him in.
Yes, I have seen drug and alcohol abuse and addiction wreck all kinds of things.
In the final analysis, the only way to treat it is to acknowledge it, get help, or get out.
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