Question of the Day: Day 3
Why is it wrong to use intimidation to get what you want from people?
posted by Michelle at 9:01 AM
We are looking for answers to some hard questions as we dig deep inside and explore our own core values and how that guides not just our own lives but the very world that we live in. These questions will be asked to a group of high school students but we would also like to hear from the world at large. While we hope to keep this forum wide open we do reserve the right to delete responses that we find to be offensive or combative in nature. Thank you for participating with us.
posted by Michelle at 9:01 AM
22 Comments:
Actually, Buddhists would say there is no right or wrong. They would only ask if you were acting with awareness and compassion.
Intimidation does not feel compassionate to me...and if someone is using it, chances are they probably are not aware of the One-ness and unity of humankind if they are trying to bully someone else to get what they want.
People are meant to work together here. I believe that when you try to make someone else feel inferior to you, less than important, you have not accomplished anything. And you lose a potential friend in the process.
Kindness, compassion and trying to understand how to work together will bring a better outcome than forcing someone to think as you do.
Intimidation is obtaining profit by sharing fear of pain. If I can make you afraid that I will hurt you, I don't even have to hurt you- I get what I want.
People who use intimidation know what it's like to be afraid and hurt, because that's how they have learned to live - and they share that misery with others, trying to give it all away so they can have some happiness.
There is no happiness in fear and pain - I will not say whether it is right or wrong, I don't really know abuot that, but I do know that it's not the kind of life I want for myself, and I wouldn't want to be responsible for giving it to anyone else.
"Pain is inevitable, misery is optional."
-unknown
The worst thing you can do to yourself is to force yourself to live in fear. Fear is the opposite of love and locks us into a prison-like way of thinking which keeps us from finding and exploring the freedom we deserve.
When you use fear and intimidation to acheive a goal you are actually hurting yourself more than anybody else because you are locking yourself into a mind-set of fear and imprisoning yourself there.
Do yourself and the world a favor and try to live in love without fear. Ask for what you believe you need and you will find that the world (and other people) tends to give you what you REALLY need (As Shrek would say, "Really Really..."). This is done without fear and without pain and everybody wins.
I belive that trying to get what you want by intimidation is not good. Because most people will not get what they want by doing that anyway. Also because no one will want to hang out with you or want to be your frined. So you may think it is cool because you get what you want at the time but you r relly not. Because there is going to be someone biger stronger and more powerful then you are. Also what go around comes around, you will most likely loss your frineds,and the respect you have. SO YOU SHOULD NOT TRY AND GO AROUND AND INTIMIDATE PEOPLE BY YOUR SIZE OR YOUR WEIHGT.
How ironic to see this question come after the war/fighting one. What is war if not the ultimate intimidation?
Using threats or fear to manipulate people leads to isolation and animosity. And there will ALWAYS be someone bigger and badder who wil eventually come along.
I believe that we tend to "get back" what we "put out" here in the world. If you dish out misery then misery will come back to you but if you interact with the world with kindness and caring then that, too, will come back to you.
I guess the bottom line, for me, is that I cannot feel good about myself if I am making someone else feel bad therefore it is wrong for me to act in a way that would cause harm (physical or emotional) to another.
In the end intimidation leads to an empty home and a forgoten grave.
It's wrong to intimidate someone because you might have the same problem as that person. And there's an old saying what comes around goes around.
Not just because it's not right, but also because intimidation can hurt not only the person(s) being intimidated, but people around the intimidatee, too.
Using intimidation is wrong because it is a from of power to control others and usually not allowing them to make a decision or opinion based personal perception.
Right? Wrong? As others have said, those things may or may not exist; I'd say they aren't the point. Intimidation, like every other action, comes back around. . . .
Well if I were to get what I wanted I would want it through honest means. recieved through my own merit. To intimidate for that outcomejust seems wrong...kinda like Bush's war on Iraq.
First, I believe that there definitely is right and wrong. Life loses meaning without that fact. I see it as something like a compass that God gives us on the day we are born - what we use to tell if we're headed in the right direction morally and ethically. And then it takes us the rest of our life to learn how to use the thing.
Why is it wrong to use intimidation? Well I think that one little trick in using our moral compass is to stop and consider how our attitudes and behavior actually affects other people. After we interact with somebody, are they better or worse off than before they met us? If we don't feel that we have helped or built up that person in any way, then we probably need to figure out how we can change that. Intimidation is a negative tactic that is designed to knock people down a peg and it damages relationships, and when we find ourselves bullying in this way we need to make a turn because we are surely heading more south than north.
It is wrong to use intimedation to get what you want because it is forcing somebody against their free
will for your own benifet.
Intimidation is a learning tool like every other feeling or emotion. When used properly it forces an individual to grow. I have felt intimidated by people/ sitiuations but then, I think why? Then I work on overcoming that feeling.
It is due to intimidation that I have learned to live. I have found that the only person that can make me feel inferior is myself. So, I refuse to allow anyone to make me feel inferior. I just hope that my brother Jon can figure this one out. He is a very good young man who needs to step out and depend on no one else but himself.
I believe it was Blanch in "A Streetcar Named Desire" Who said, "I often depend on the kindness of strangers." She let Stanley intimidate her and did not learn anything from it. I feel sorry for her. Dont be a BLANCH....
I read Steven R. Covey's book 7 habit of effective people and I learned that there are two types of mentalities: the "Scarcity" mentality and the abundant mentality. We all need to learn that there is enough for all of us and not to fear not getting enough. When people learn this mentaliyt then it nobody gets intimidated.
It is wrong to use intimidation to get what you want from people because it is almost like trying to take control of the things that the other person does.
I think it can be very wrong to try and intimadate others. Because it not only can effect you, but it can effect others in the process. It can lead to people not being able to trust you and also have others not want to be around you. I think that after a while it can give you a bad name. Also it might cause you to not have any friends. Or cause your friends to be the same way.
to some using intimidation to get what you want is wrong. it is the same as stealing. you force people to give you something and it is a sin to the christian belief. to make someone do something u make your self less of a person. u lose what compassion god gave you for your own personal gain.
So, I had to think about this one a long time. The first reaction is to say something along the lines of "Do unto others as you would have done to you". No one wants to be forced or coerced into doing anything, yet it happens everyday in some degree or another.
Somewhere, there is a line that is crossed where the one who feels intimidated feels bad for having been intimidated. And, I might add, that hopefully the aggressor feels bad for his or her actions.
However, in raising children, intimidation is often used along with reward to guide, teach, and discipline. Short of verbal and physical abuse, rarely does anyone think that those less intense forms of intimidation are wrong. It seems confusing, probably because what's acceptable and what isn't is not separated by a precise line. Instead, there's a gray area, a transition zone, separating the bad from the acceptable intimidation.
OK, now I'm confused! I guess we just need to care about how each other feels about our actions and must be positive that what is gained from the lesser forms of intimidation actually benefits BOTH parties or not use it at all.
Dang! These are tough questions.
because that's not the way to get what you want.
that's not the way to go you might get what you want but the person isn't happy.
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